Your Imaginary Fashion Coalition

May 4, 2015

This is an excerpt from my upcoming book The Art of Resale.

I’d like for you do an important exercise with me before going on your next shopping trip. I’m going to tell you what to say when you talk to yourself. 

Please trust me on this but more importantly, trust your instincts!  

I promise I won’t steer you off-course. I want you to succeed in this endeavor and have fun in the process.

Life’s too short to waste your time on anything you don’t feel fabulous in and out of. Don’t do it, don’t buy it, don’t keep it if it’s not exquisite.

Say it with me, friends. If it isn’t exquisite, GET RID OF IT! This is my constant life motto and it does apply to everything.


You feel way more than you think about fashion and style. If it doesn’t feel good, don’t think about it anymore. Flip it, give it away, donate it.

When you gaze into your abyss wardrobe, what do you see?  I’m going to ask you to cast a critical eye, but please, not on yourself.

Do it with the clothes and accessories you already have. 

What is the predominant color family of most of your items? How many bags do you have of “projects”?

This is anything you’re not wearing or flipping for profit. It’s not doing any good taking up valuable real estate in your closet and psyche.

What have you forgotten about because it’s been stowed away for so long?

Think about all of the subscriptions that you have with these issues, whether it’s missing buttons, has stains, tears, snags, and beyond. 

Don’t forget to include what doesn’t fit, even the pretty pieces you can squeeze into but they still don’t fit well. 

Gentleman friends, do you reach for the same jeans, t-shirt, or coat?  What color, texture, and material are they? Listen to Tom Ford, I implore you.


What about workout wear? What makes you feel good?

I have a magnificent coalition of fabulous people I’ve assembled, dead and alive. They’re mostly reliable and ready to give me input and perspective.

I’m usually solo on my shopping excursions as I live further away from many friends and family. Who’s going to help me out?

I’m not immune to making the wrong purchases. I constantly revisit everything in my closet and in my virtual stores.

My blunders happen much less often since I’ve enlisted the help of my imaginary style coalition.

Whether I’m sorting items at home or am about to purchase new-to-me goodies, I think of what my imaginary stylish friends would tell me.


Photo credit J. David McKenney

How exquisite is this Pidgin doll tribute to Grace Jones?!?  My imaginary fashion coalition usually includes her, John Waters, the Marchesa Luisa Casati, Alexander McQueen, Oscar Wilde, and Dolly Parton. 

Going to DollyWood is on my bucket list. I have a ticket to see John Waters at the end of the month, so here’s to making those a reality.

I’ve imagined Alexander McQueen telling me this dress (from his diffusion line with Target) went well with my hair. Sometimes I think he’s secretly calling me a w*nker behind my back, haha.


I also daydream that Grace is towering next to me, wildly shaking her head no when I consider a hat purchase.

When I’m down to the wire and need to make a fast decision, I imagine what each of these marvelous people would say to me.

Would they let me purchase an item I’m trying on? Would they give it to their mom, dad, or sister?

If I could hear the eccentric Marchesa Casati’s speaking voice, I imagine that she’d ridicule me for looking at overpriced Forever 21 dresses at Goodwill.

Assemble your own imaginary fashion coalition and please include me, if you like. The possibilities are endless!

I promise I won’t be rude and reproachful. I do reserve the right to give you major side eye if you tell yourself that you can settle and wear unflattering clothes.

I knew a girl who would cut the size tags from her clothing because the made up numbers (like the concept of BMI) used to greatly bother her.

They’re just numbers and have no value as to your strength, character and compassion.

The fashion industry is both glamorous yet extraordinarily ugly.

This is a brilliant quote I saw on Pinterest. 


Your imaginary fashion coalition can give you a boost and a shot of truth when you need it.

Feel free to tell me who you choose for your own personal coalition and why. I’d love to hear about it soon!

Have a beautiful and silly day,




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